The Day My Biggest Vices Got Married and Had a Baby: Overthinking & The Bachelor {Notes from a Recovering Perfectionist (and oh yeah a Northern VA Photographer)}

Have you ever had one of those days where you just second-guessed everything you did?  Yesterday was one of those days for me.  One goal of mine for this year is to be more productive and intentional with my time.  I had carved special time out on Sunday to look ahead and plan for this week:  tasks to accomplish, meals for the week, social media posts, etc.  I had jotted down three manageable tasks for my Monday and closed my planner ready and energized to start a new week.

And then the new week started.  But I got stuck.

I don't get a lot of work time on days that Charlotte does not have preschool.  So the few minutes I do get, really need to count!  I sat down to tackle #1 on my list which was supposed to be a QUICK social media post.  It is so dumb that I'm kind of embarassed to admit it, but I got absolutely STUCK trying to post something on my business Facebook page about the Bachelor.  

Yes, the freaking Bachelor.

I knew what I wanted to say.  Another one of my goals this year is to spend less time being "all about me", showing off my sessions, talking about my work, etc. and more time bonding with my clients and building relationships with you.  That's important to me!  So, I wanted to ask my clients and Facebook friends about the Bachelor.  Who's watching?  Do you love it/hate it?  What do you think of Nick?  Is Corinne bat-shit crazy, or crazy smart?  Like I said, stupid stuff.  But also, stuff I love to talk about and thought maybe a few others would too and that we could connect.  

So how did I get stuck if I knew what I wanted to say?

It's so, so, so dumb.  But I got stuck because I didn't have a photograph to go with my post.  Isn't that the dumbest reason ever????  I kind of want to crawl in a hole because it's so silly when I say it out loud.  I had meant to get a rose at the store to take a picture of and forgot.  And then, for whatever reason, I got all in my head... shouldn't I, as a professional photographer, be only posting my own work (not stock photos), taken with my good camera (not my phone!! gasp!!), fully edited, exported, and resized???  And with this one very simple problem, I went down the rabbit-hole of the internet searching for various incredibly embarrassing topics because I was convinced that I was no good at this and that maybe I should be doing something different.

And POOF! before I knew it, my time was up and I had to take off my work hat and put my mom hat back on.  I felt so frustrated and annoyed at myself for wasting time on something SO DUMB!  Before taking my girls outside to play, I shot my business mentor, the amazing Kimberly Haydn, an email 'fessing up to my waste of time and asking for advice on what kind of imagery to post.

Her answer was so blessedly simple.


Don't post a picture.  Or post a photo of something else you were working on that day and say how much you were looking forward to The Bachelor.  THINK OUTSIDE THE BOX!  Don't overthink it!!!!

I laughed when I read the email because it was so easy, but in the moment, all I could think of was how to do something the 'perfect' way.  Have you ever fallen into that trap before?  I was trying to force this genuine post into something totally not genuine at all because of the quest for the 'perfect' picture to go with it.  I thought I had gotten over being a perfectionist, but apparently a few stubborn bits of it are left within me.  Sometimes that's good, but yesterday it was bad.  

Kim gave me one more piece of advice.  "...When you start to feel stuck, set your timer for five minutes and if you can't figure it out go do something else for a while and come back to that post later. Sometimes giving your brain a break helps! Not only because you're not wasting all that time, but because sometimes the answer might just come to you if you're not obsessing over it."

Once again, so simple but completely genius for an over-thinker like me.  I just had to share it in case someone else out there can relate!  

Besides this silly Bachelor post, there were other decisions weighing on my mind that I had been over-thinking all day so I decided to get out of the house for a bit to clear my head and the sunset was SO gorgeous it took my breath away.  I ate dinner ALL. BY. MYSELF. and then met a sweet friend for coffee.  When I got home, my amazing husband (who had cooked dinner for the girls, given them a bath, and put them to bed!) had pressed pause on The Bachelor so that we could watch it together without missing one silly minute of that crazy show.  (Did I mention how much I love him??)

All of those little acts of self-care set me right back on track because they gave me the mental space to take a deep breath and put everything right back into perspective.  The Facebook post and other things on my mind were really pretty small and insignificant things in the grand scheme of life.  Sometimes, it is really easy to get wrapped up in all the little things that are bothering you and let them sweep you away.  

Yesterday, I remembered to focus on the other small things.  The ones that mean more and add up to all the goodness in my world.  Chalk sidewalk drawings on an unusually warm winter day.  A colorful sunset.  A peaceful meal.  A pretty cup of mocha with a friend.  My guilty pleasure on TV with the love of my life beside me.  

So, here is my silly, stupid post about the Bachelor (along with photos from my phone and a graphic from the internet!!) wrapped in a different package and with a different message.  

Hope you have a wonderful and productive Tuesday, that your day means something to you, that you take a moment to do something JUST FOR YOU...

...and that, when in doubt, don't overthink it... 

...just do it. 

(or at least set the timer!)